How to Video Chat with Strangers When You Have Social Anxiety

How to Video Chat with Strangers When You Have Social Anxiety

Understanding Social Anxiety

What is Social Anxiety?

Social anxiety, or ‘social phobia’, is known as intense fear, anxiety and avoidance of social situations. People with social phobia have an intense fear of being perceived or judged by others. Often times, this can lead to severe stress that can disrupt their life. Social anxiety can interfere with relationships, make daily routines difficult, or make it hard to attend work or school.

Symptoms of Social Anxiety

Contrary to popular belief, social anxiety is so much more than “feeling shy”. This phobia is a chronic mental disorder that doesn’t go away and affects day-to-day activities, self esteem, or relationships.

Of course, everyone worries about social situations every now and then. Someone with social anxiety, however, feels this much more intense and tends to be overly worried before, during and after a social interaction. Social anxiety usually appears in the early to mid-teens, but it can also begin in younger children or adults.

Symptoms include:

  • Fear of everyday activities; like meeting new people, starting conversations, making a phone call, interacting with your coworkers, or buying groceries
  • Avoiding most social activities, group conversations, parties
  • Fear of negative judgement, being criticized, or being perceived by others
  • Worrying about embarrassing or humiliating oneself
  • Blushing, sweating, trembling, stuttering, weak knees, cold sweaty hands, heart racing, nausea, shaking voice, trouble breathing, dizziness, blank mind, muscle tension, panic attacks
  • Over-analyzing own performance, flaws, and interactions
  • Expecting the worst possible consequences from a negative social interaction

How Common Is Social Anxiety?

If you experience social anxiety, you are not alone! Approximately 5% to 10% of all people suffer from social phobia. Especially in new or uncertain situations many people feel nervous and scared. While social anxiety can be a chronic mental health condition, learning and adapting coping strategies can help to gain confidence and improve social interactions.

How Can Video Chatting With Strangers Trigger Social Anxiety?

“Stranger Danger”

We all know that the internet can be a risky, unpredictable place. A lot of questions come up: Who am I going to meet? What if they’re not who they say they are? What if they’re rude or make fun of me? All of these are very valid concerns. The thought of video chatting with a complete stranger can be nerve wracking, but exciting at the same time. On one hand it’s a chance to meet someone new, on the other hand it’s natural to feel nervous. The good thing: you are in control of your experience! You choose who you interact with, how long you talk, and when to end the chat.

The Unfamiliar

Video chatting with random strangers is completely different from video chatting with close friends or family. Meeting strangers is unpredictable, unpreparable and uncertain. A new situation with every “skip”. Video chatting with friends and family is a comfortable experience. You know their “quirks”, their sense of humor, and they know yours. There’s a level of trust and understanding that makes it easy to chat with them. But when you video chat with strangers, you’re stepping into the unknown. The unfamiliarity can deepen feelings of social anxieties - you will find yourself worrying about making a good first impression, finding common ground or just worrying about what to say. But isn’t that part of the fun? Every new chat is a chance to learn something new! A chance to meet someone interesting and step out of your comfort zone.

Performance Pressure

Trying to make a good first impression to the stranger on the other end of the screen can be difficult. Video chatting with strangers can feel like a “performance”. You suddenly get hyper aware of everything - how you look, that stupid strand of hair that doesn’t cooperate, the unflattering lighting. You start worrying about your voice cracking, stumbling over your words, or running out of things to say. “Am I interesting enough? Does my voice sound weird? Why did I say that?” It’s like stepping onto a stage where you’re judged - leading to your anxiety to spike. The pressure to be camera ready and interesting gets intensified when interacting with strangers.

How to Video Chat with Strangers When You Have Social Anxiety

All of these concerns are valid. We get it! Putting yourself out there IS scary! The idea of video chatting with someone new, someone you don’t know at all, can be terrifying. But those butterflies in your stomach? Those nervous flashes going through your body? They are normal. We’ve all started there. Whether you worry about being judged or about awkward silences, or just the feeling of “being on display”, feeling anxious about video chatting with strangers is totally understandable. You’re not alone in this - millions of people experience social anxiety, and we want you to know your feelings are okay!

Using Chitchat.gg as a Safe Space to Build Confidence

Building Social Skills

While it can be scary, our video chat feature offers a controlled environment. You can practice social interactions while being comfortably at home. This can be extremely empowering, without adding the pressure of face to face meetings. Consider it a training ground for your social skills! :) You can experiment with different styles of conversating, you can try out new jokes, and you can learn how to read subtle cues; like facial expressions or body language. And when things get awkward or uncomfortable you can simply hit “Skip” and end the chat.

Gradual Exposure Through Video Chat

In the same way exposure therapy can help overcoming phobias, video chatting with strangers can work in similar ways. Each chat is a small step to building your confidence. You can start having shorter conversations at first, and work your way up to longer chats. This allows you to acclimate to the social setting at your own pace. The more positive experiences you have, the more you will associate social interactions with positive feelings! More and more you’ll realize that the fear and anxiety you feel are often much worse than the reality of the situation. Your confidence will grow with each successful chat. Before you know, chatting with new people will feel natural!

Connect Over Social Anxiety

A great opportunity our platform offers is that you can filter people by interests. This means you can connect with people who share your hobbies, passions, or even social anxiety. When you share common ground with someone or connect with someone over the same struggles, it feels much more effortless. Awkward silences become less because you have something to talk about. This is really benefitial for social anxiety and removes the pressure of having to find a topic. It’s a natural connection from the start. Finding people who share your interests can also feel like you belong and give a sense of community - this is vital! When you feel accepted and understood by others, your confidence grows, and social anxiety can losen its grip.

If the idea of video chatting with strangers makes you nervous: it’s okay! But don’t let your nerves hold you back! Start small and be kind to yourself. Once you start, you will soon be surprised at how quickly you start to enjoy meeting new people! Every chat is a chance to grow and become more confident. Ready to try?

Start Chatting!

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